Music of the 90s

The 1990s might be my favorite musical decade of all time. This is probably attributable to the fact that I lived through it, and have memories of when the songs came out. However, even I'm aware that the 90s were a very uneven decade when it came to music. There was really no common thread, and there were as many misses for me as there were hits. As a thought experiment, I decided to put on the "90's" station (brought to you by Comcast) to get a quick survey of the decade in music. Here's the list, with a few comments.

1. Losing My Religion (REM)- "Oh...life is bigger/It's bigger than you/and you are not me." Quite possibly the most ridiculous set of lyrics I've ever heard. The song itself might be one of the best of the decade though.

2. Good Vibrations (Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch)- Who would have thought that Marky Mark would have had a career after this song came out? Beautiful thing about this country; old celebrities never die, they just find new ways to resurrect.

3. Bitch (Meredith Brooks)- Maybe it's because I'm a dude, and couldn't possibly relate to this song. However, I don't know a woman who doesn't like this song. I guess its the "I Will Survive" of the 90s.

4. Achy Breaky Heart (Billy Ray Cyrus)- I rue the day this man was born. Not only is this up in the top 5 worst songs of the decade (listen to the Weird Al parody at some point, so good), and NOT ONLY did he have the world's dumbest mullet, but he brought forth the plague that is Hannah Montana. Yuck.

5. Hold My Hand (Hootie and the Blowfish)- I was watching Jerry MacGuire, and it never fails to crack me up when the kid goes up to Cuba Gooding Jr., and asks "Are you Hootie?" I'm sure Darius Rucker has been asked that question a billion times, and I'm pretty sure that it used to piss him off somethign righteous. Too bad they only had one good album...

6. Braking all the Rules (She Moves)- Now I'd never heard of this band before, but I'm sure the brains behind this song had a thought pattern that went something like this: "You know that 'Tearin Up My Heart' song is doing pretty well. Why don't we make another song that sounds just like it in every way, but have women singing it? It can't miss..." But it did.

7. I Could Fall in Love (Selena)- I can't tell if the movie was a good thing for her memory. The movie wasn't bad, but I'm pretty sure that most people just remember J.Lo.

8. No Rain (Blind Melon)- Everyone knows the song, and most remember the video. Too bad they didn't put anything else out; I guess that's the downside of a heroin addiction.

9. The Way You Do the Things You Do (UB-40)- I know this was a cover, but I can't for the life of me remember who they were covering. Also, did they ever do a song that was not a cover?

10. Baby, One More Time (Britney Spears)- Oh Britney, Britney, how were we supposed to know? Pop stars have a short shelflife, until they start doing ridiculous, embarassing shit (See, Jackson, Michael) but nobody could have predicted that you would flame out so spectacularly.

11. You Mean the World To Me (Toni Braxton)- Almost forgot this song existed. I guess that's the effect of making possibly the most melodramatic song of all time.

12. Give Me One Reason (Tracy Chapman)- I wonder what ever happened to her. I loved her voice, just perfect and bluesy. But two major hits and we never heard from her again. Pity.

13. Graduate (Third Eye Blind)- This song got lost in the uproar over Semi-Charmed Life and Jumper, but it was a legitimate hit in its own right. These guys are possibly the best example of the scourge of 90s bands- the inability to follow up an amazing debut (Hootie and the Blowfish, Alanis Morrisette, etc...). At least they put out one amazing album.

14. Mo Money, Mo Problems (Too many artists for me to remember)- Honestly, why in hell does Diddy (or at the time the song came out, still Puff Daddy) feel the need to ruin perfectly good songs by putting himself in the song? He's just not very good at rapping, and should leave it to the professionals.

15. Unbelievable (EMF)- A perfect example of the mid-90s one-hit wonder. An extremely catchy song with a hook people remember, and nobody knows any words outside of the chorus.

16. As Long As You Love Me (Backstreet Boys)- I hate bubblegum pop. Its just brutal on the brain. I mean, at least Disney has not achieved total cultural saturation with its current infection of this schlock. I'm proud to say that I have not heard one single song put out by any of these Disney pseudo-bands.

17. U Can't Touch This (MC Hammer)- What a fantastic sample, possibly the best of all time. Also, the male orc dance in WoW is the MC Hammer dance, which is awesome.

18. Walking on Broken Glass (The Eurythmics)- A forgotten song, mostly because of how unbelivably good Sweet Dreams was. The Eurythmics are undeniably cool, and I think I should listen to more of them at some point.

19. What Is Love (Haddaway)- Maybe I'm the only person who liked Night at the Roxbury (while realizing that the movie wasn't very good), but this song is pretty much the only thing people remember about it. The Diet Pepsi commercial last year using it was pretty excellent.

20. Everything I Do, I Do It For You (Bryan Adams)- It might be unmanly to say, but I like this song. I guess it came out early enough that I don't remember the incredible overplay that I'm sure accompanied its release. The movie disappointed, especially given how incredible the cast was, but it led to one hell of a parody. At least the song endured.

In summation, the 90s was a weird music decade. Some amazing stuff at the beginning, nothing good at the end, and a bunch of bright gems popping up throughout. Fortunately, the good stuff was good enough to save the decade, and make it awesome.

May all your hits be crits,
B